Is it really hard for your child on the spectrum to cope with changes to routine? Not sure how to help them? Then try the ideas in this article!
Kids with autism thrive on routine and always like to know what’s right around the corner. In a recent post, I discussed using visual schedules to help routines run smoother. But what about the times when routines are out of whack?
Life happens. Vacations, illness, bad weather, even road construction can derail a kid’s schedule. So how do you get through these wrenches life throws at you? Today’s post talks about how to help kids with autism deal with change in routine.
Prepare For The Unexpected
Change can be hard, especially for those living with autism. Spontaneous change can be particularly difficult because there isn’t time for foreshadowing. Even though you may not know what the unexpected will bring there are things you can do to help your child be prepared to deal with change in routine.
Manage Expectations By Using A Question Mark
- As you write out your daily list with your child, put a question mark by a couple of activities to indicate those events are a possibility, not a certainty
- Practice not doing those activities from time to time
- Talk about things like not enough time, space, or materials
- Make a plan to do the canceled event another time
Model Behavior That Deals With Change In Routine
- Pick a simple task you do and come up with a reason why you can’t do it when you were planning on it. For example, you ran out of coffee and can’t make any.
- Verbalize your thought process: “Oh, no I’m out of coffee and I want to make some.”
- Express your feelings: “I really want coffee and am frustrated that I can’t have some.”
- Talk about an alternative solution: “Well I can’t have coffee. I can make another choice. We have tea or hot chocolate. I will pick tea. Then I will put the coffee on the shopping list and buy some at the store so I can have it tomorrow.”
Talk About Life Interruptions
- Write social stories about different scenarios that can change routines
- During pretend play interactions roleplay changes in routine
- Normalize situations like weather changes, people run late, etc.
How To Deal With Change In Routine
Helping kids understand plans change at a moment’s notice can deal with change in routine. When schedules are broken it still is normal to get upset. Here are some tips to help them work through the disappointment.
Help Your Child Calm Down
- Help your child calm down with the tools you normally use before discussing the change in routine
- Let your child select a preferred activity to help redirect and distract from disappointment
- Take a sensory break to help calm child
Talk About It!
- After your child is calmer and in a good spot to talk discuss the situation
- Help child recall how life can change through social stories, role-playing or past events
Make A New Plan For The Change
- Provide alternative solutions: “We normally go to the park, but it’s raining. Instead, we could build an obstacle course or go on a scavenger hunt.”
- Let your child help decide what the solution will be
- Help your child see when he or she will be able to get back to a normal routine. Look at the calendar, write down a schedule for the next day, etc.
Reward Your Child
- Praise your child for coping and making alternative plans
- Describe the positive behaviors: ”I like how you calmed down after taking some deep breaths and made another choice”
- Reward child: extra time for favorite activity, extra attention from you, stickers or another treat
An unexpected change in routine can be difficult and disappointing. Following these tips will help kids with autism deal with change in routine and teach them valuable skills in flexibility and going with the flow.
Elizabeth Purpero is a licensed school counselor and licensed professional counselor-in-training. She has her master’s in counseling psychology. Elizabeth has worked as an autism therapist with children and teens. During her career, she has worked in intensive at-home therapy programs utilizing ABA and play therapy along with OT and speech therapy techniques. She has also worked as a mental health therapist helping clients address their mental health issues as it relates to autism. Elizabeth’s background working with the autism community has greatly helped her work with students in schools too. She has helped teachers implement effective strategies, create goals for IEP’s and make classrooms more sensory-friendly. Mark Twain once said, “Write what you know about,” and Elizabeth enjoys writing about autism-related topics and providing additional resources to help those impacted by autism.